Erasure Poem

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March SOL Challenge #19

In January of this year Dana Murphy blogged on the TWT about “Erasure Poems.”  Ever since then, I’ve been wanting to try (my olw) one out.

I am using a slice that I wrote and published in December, 2013; “A House That Still Stands.”  At the end of my poem I’ve included a picture of my “erasing” which is really crossing out.  This was fun.  It took some thought as to which of my slices would fit best with this structure.  Once again, I’ve learned a vital lesson here.  By doing this myself I can better understand it and by fully understanding it I can teach it to someone else.  Thank you Dana!  Here goes……

A House That Still Stands

A tornado

One house devastated

Brick and siding left

House next door still stands

Not touched

Cancer

So many people caught in its path

Those who have been struck

Those who have remained “in tact”

Pictures on TV

The tattered photo album

The broken crock pot

Car parts hanging in the tree

The path of cancer

Hits one

Misses another

Destruction

Chaos

Agony

World turned upside down

It doesn’t make sense

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14 thoughts on “Erasure Poem

  1. Great job Carrie! The short phrases, especially the one word lines have such impact. It’s like seeing a commercial without sound. You really focus your attention on what is being shown. “The broken crock pot.” “Car parts hanging in the tree.” What a picture of how such random things are strewn about. Way to try something new! I like it! 😉

  2. Carrie, isn’t Erasure Poetry just wonderful? I’m going to be doing this with the whole class next month. I think this type of poetry seeks the words/phrases that make an impact. You were successful in that. Can I use it as one of my mentor texts?

  3. Wow…I am moved. The way the tornado and cancer leaves a similarly destructive path. I actually read the poem 4 or 5 times before I commented. I have not heard of Erasure poetry before, but this was beautiful and poignant!! I may have to try it after talking with some of our staff about how it is done!!

  4. I wonder how it felt to make the decision to completely eliminate the last two paragraphs. When I compare the before and after of the two pieces, it’s clear that the comparison between the tornado and cancer is much more vivid in the poem…fewer words with a huge meaning.

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